One of the easiest and most dangerous things in the world is not to pay attention. One day you fail to notice that your hair is getting a little shaggy. Because of that, people you’d otherwise not give the time of day to start approaching you and asking you directions since you look “kinda like them”. Bit by bit and day by day your hair gets longer and dirtier and you stop bathing twice a day until your morals become just as filthy and foul as your external appearance and smell.
Because you didn’t pay attention.
I’m here to tell you that’s what happening now right here in America. We been trying and trying to warn y’all but you just won’t listen because you’re not paying attention.
For the past coupla weeks, Shelley The Republican pointed out two of the most dangerous threats to the United States – Murderous Chinks and bicycles. We presented no-nonsense facts and truth and still y’all just refused to take a bath or cut your hair.
I only pray that God and this video is gonna take the scales away from your eyes.
While driving to witness tonight I had to go through Harvard Sq. and the most horrible sight appeared like a demon in front of me – thousands of bicycles taking up every square inch of the road where the cars belong! Fortunately, God blessed me with a video phone and I’m able to give y’all a sample of what life’s gonna be like if we don’t deal with the Chinese real soon.
When, in the name of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, are we gonna put an end to the Yellow Menace of China?! First, they poison our pets. Then they poison our children. And now they continue their godless commie poisoning of our nation’s morals by letting Chink movie director, Ang Lee, release yet another porno movie. Lee, who was responsible for the hardcore homo movie, Brokeback Mountain, is set to unleash a movie called “Lust, Caution” full of marital infidelity and graphic non-missionary sexual positions that’ll no doubt win him another golden idol of Baal from Gollywierd. When will America learn its lesson from the Muppets – just because something’s tiny and cute don’t mean it ain’t from the Devil.
I’m sure that none of you know the story of the good Samaritan but the short version goes like this – Some Jew gets beat up and all these holier than thou types just turn up their noses at him while he’s lying there close to death on the side of the road. Finally, some guy that hates Jews helps him out. It’s time for y’all to stop hating Ted Haggard and start helping him. His salary from New Life Church runs out at the end of the year and, with two years left on their degree from the University of Phoenix, he and his wife are gonna need some help. So, look in your heart and see if you can spare $10 or $20 a month to get ‘em through these hard times. Send your checks to Ted and Gayle Haggard, 9699 N. Hayden, Suite 108, PMB 180, Scottsdale, AZ 95259. He spent three hard months learning how to be straight again. I think he deserves it!
As you know, God sent me to minister to the lie-beral sodomites in Massachusetts and judging by the car horns that woke me up this morning, one thing seems pretty clear – Lie-berals only hate LEGAL Mexicans. Why else would they be celebrating the resignation of Roberto Gonzales? Here is a Mexican that did something good for America – he kept us safe from terrorists and got rid of US attorneys that weren’t doing their job good. But because he didn’t act like an Uncle Tomas; because he didn’t sneak across the border to steal TVs, get drunk and sell drugs to school kids; because he didn’t shoot people execution style outside of schools, the lie-berals decided that he had to go. America is less safe today and you can thank the dumbo-crats for that.
[Note – I’m on vacation but this is too important not to comment on]
“A’ight, you #)@&U%#*@s, who wanna kill some babies ri’ now! I’se gots some reeeal fine babies who just ready t’ bite ‘n claw dey selfs to deaf! Who wanna piece o’ dis akSHUN, y’all!”
This picture of a baby after a cage match would
evoke nothing but smiles and chuckles from lie-beral
dumbo-crats. Christians, however, weep for at the mistreatment
of ALL life.
What the heck?! Has that vacation gone to old Billy Bob’s head? Has he been sitting on the beach in between prayer meetings without no sunscreen? Is he turning into one of them poor pathetic people with nothing better to do then write whatever garbage comes into his head and put it on the Internet? Well, I hope y’all would know me better than that! Let’s try that first sentence with one of them words changed.
“A’ight, you #)@&U%#*@s, who wanna kill some dogs ri’ now! I’se gots some reeeal fine dogs who just ready t’ bite ‘n claw dey selfs to deaf! Who wanna piece o’ dis acSHUN, y’all!”
Negro football player Michael Vick’s list of “crimes”
somehow never mention his obvious contempt for God.
I hope y’all ain’t drunk so much lie-beral kool-aid that I’m gonna have to spend too much time on this. The fact is that any dumbo-crat that read that first statement was prolly looking for the closest ATM cuz there’s nothing they like better than dead babies. So the thought of being able to not only watch babies dying but being able to BET on which one’s gonna win prolly the height of they think “culture” oughta be. It’s just another way to boost the growing dead-baby economy that Planned Parenthood and Margaret Sanger’s descendants work so hard to fuel. They’d think nothing of throwing two pre-borns in a cage match and that’s the truth. Can’t y’all just hear the homos screaming “BRING ON THE LIONS!”
But dogs – oh, my goodness, that different story! Dogs is “man’s best friend”.
The folks at Pre-born Eaters Thank America (or whatever PETA stands for) just cannot believe that Michael Vick would be so cruel, mean, evil, heartless and un-new-age as to be so mean to a dumb animal. Doggies, I guess, is just more cute and cuddly than pre-born child. You can put bandannas on them and teach them how to catch Frisbees.
Perhaps if pre-borns could catch frisbees, the ghouls
at PETA might care a little more about them. But since
it takes several years for a child to master the eye-hand
coordination necessary, they have no problem killing them.
What’s more (and I think this is the whole point) homos and lesbians can have as many dogs as they want cuz moral people know that homos and lesbos should have kids. I ain’t got much Internet access right now, but I’ll bet that if you looked up all the people that belonged to PETA, you’d find prolly 85-90% actively live against Levitical teaching. That means that there’re still plenty of places in America where they ain’t allowed to have kids. So, if you look at it logically, it ain’t no big surprise that don’t care nothing about pre-borns. It just gets ‘em all mad and they gotta go out and buy another dress (homos) or a new wrench (lesbos) to calm down.
The point I’m trying to make is that if Michael Vick had a baby fighting ring instead of a dog fighting ring, he’d probably not only still be playing football (the REAL football) but he’d have some kind of government subsidy and Planned Parenthood would provide the babies.
America, y’all oughta be ashamed of yourselves!
God is Love!
We thank you for President Bush and his unwavering stewardship of Your command to bring democracy to Iraq
Very few presidents would have the single-mindedness to unquestioningly place their faith in Your hands
They would have sold the country You created out to the towelheaded islamo-fascists as quick as you could say Madalyn Murray O’Hare and then broken their marriage vows with a chubby Jewess
President Bush knows what is truly important and it does not involve listening to the nattering nabobs of negativism with a backbone as limp as a cross-dressing invalid
We also thank you for the remarkable service of Tony Snow who, day after day, valiantly struggled to the get the truth out to the American public despite a press that makes al Jazeera look like Fox News
Merciful Creator, I humbly thank you for steering that hurricane away from North Carolina so that our family vacation remains pleasant and that the Mexcians might learn to stop sending their drugged up, drunken criminals and prostitutes to sully the land You hold above all others
God is Love!
On Saturday night, I got a couple of emails from supporters asking if I was concerned that Mitt “Magic Underpants” Romney won the Iowa Republican Presidential Straw Poll. I ain’t trying to put no one down, but the truth’s gotta be said – If God says he’s gonna do something then He’s gonna do it. God told me that I would be President of the United States and, although I admit sometimes that I feel a little like Jonah did and I got no need to get swallowed up by a whale so I’m gonna do whatever God tells me to.
It’s like my daddy always said – if God tells you
to got to Atlanta, you don’t go to Lubbock.
So, am I concerned about it? Nope. Mitt the Ma**hole can spend more money than a Jew in a Christian blood bank but in the end it ain’t gonna mean nothing. God’s gonna win every time. And if he thinks there’s a place for a perverter of God’s word in a Neck administration then he’s in for a shock. That don’t mean that y’all should sit back until 1/20/09 like there weren’t no danger cuz that ain’t the case.
Even though Mor(m)ons choose Satan over Jesus, they got spies in the Christian church. It works like this – pseudo-Christians, like Lutherans and Methodists make all nice with fake Christians like Rick Warren under the guise of “Christian unity”. Rick Warren then feeds information to the Mor(m)ons to help them with the destruction of the true Christian church. So there ain’t no doubt that the Mor(m)ons know of God’s plan and if the Grand High Underpants (or whatever the Mor(m)on pope is called) knows I’m gonna be President then you can be dang sure that Mitt knows.
This flowchart shows how Rick Warren and the Mor(m)ons
get the information they need to plot the destruction of
Now some of you are saying, “Well, Billy Bob, that makes a lot of sense but if Mitt knows he ain’t gotta chance then why’s he even bothering?” And that’s why I’m concerned – Mitt’s run for the President ain’t got nothing to do with winning the Presidency and everything to do with spreading the lies of Mor(m)onism.
Every single time you see that dog torturer up on the TV or in the newspaper or the Watchtower, what’s the first word that pops into the average secular Americans head? “Hairspray”? “Botox”? Maybe, but more than likely it’s “Mor(m)orn”.
The Mor(m)ons are so treacherous that their “religion” has
two names. While they will claim that LDS stands for “Latter
Day Saints” but there are those that believe it stands for “Let’s Deify
Satan”. Others point out the simplistic anagram of LSD. Either way,
it’s clear that it really spells E-V-I-L.
The Mor(m)on church (like Satan) loves to set membership goals. It ain’t so much about God or keeping outta Hell as it is about fleecing the flock for 10% of their paycheck. After all, golden plates ain’t free and neither are the private goon squad provided to them polygamy compounds they got. No, they gotta keep adding new members. I read somewhere they wanna have 280 million Mor(m)ons by 2080! If that ain’t enough to frighten you, I don’t know what is. At the moment, though, they only got 13,000,000. And how’re you gonna come up with 263 million people stupid enough to become Mor(m)ons? Put one on the front page of the newspaper every single day.
If you took 280 millions Mor(m)ons and put them all
in Greenland, that would suit me just fine.
It’s deviously clever and treacherous. We all gotta keep on out toes. He ain’t gonna be bombing Iran. That’s gonna be me. But he could be taking a lot of souls to Hell.
Don’t let it happen!
God is Love!