Archive for the ‘Satan’ Category

postheadericon God Kills People Who Star In Vampire Movies!

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postheadericon The Laziness of the Lame Stream Media

haiti

It’s about time that Christians woked up to the fact that the lie-beral defeat-crat media don’t care nothing about any kinda truth, especially the truth of God’s Love.  You only need to look at the earthquake in Haiti to see that. Pat Robertson spoke the truth about Haiti selling its soul to the devil to get free of the cheese eating surrender monkey French. Rather than send reporters to look for the contract signed in blood by Satan himself, they just laughed it off. I talked to one “reporter” that said it woulda been destroyed in the earthquake but what he didn’t think about is whatever paper it’s written on gotta be indestructible enough be able to withstand fire and all sorts things otherwise the Devil wouldn’t be able to keep no records of the souls he’s corrupted.  It’s just another example of the lame-stream media’s laziness when it comes to the really important issues.

The Laziness Of The Lame Stream Media

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postheadericon Pat Robertson: Kill The Messenger

haiti_satan

Ain’t nobody likes watching people suffer, even if it’s Negroes, but if someone points out that putting a gun to your head and pulling the trigger ain’t too good an idea, how can you say that person is saying something bad? And yet that’s just what Godless lie-berals is doing to poor Pat Robertson just for pointing out the fact that Haiti wouldn’t be in the shape that it’s in if it hadn’t made a pact with Satan. Only a neo-Darwinist can’t see God’s punishing fist of fury smashing down sinners over there just like he done in New York City, New Orleans, Burma and Myanmar. I know that everybody saying this is just a “natural disaster” but who do you think made nature. That’s right. God did. And if He can bring a rain of toads down on Egypt for disobeying His Word, I think He can handle a earthquake. So y’all shut up and listen Pat Robertson instead of mocking him or you could be next.

Pat Roberson – Kill The Messenger

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postheadericon Seven Headed Vampires Don’t Stand A Chance Against Jesus

I’m guessing that most of you ain’t had no run-ins with demons with glowing red eyes or two-foot tall robins with blood dripping from their beaks.  It ain’t too pretty and it ain’t real fun.  Satan preys on the weak and sends evil down in all manner of creatures.

There ain’t but one way to fight Satan’s minions and that’s JESUS! Do y’all really think that you’re strong enough to go up against a mailbox with twelve ax-wielding arms and the jaws of a shark? Jesus fights off 37 of ’em before He even gets out of bed and don’t even break a sweat!

This poor Negro girl who grew up in a voodoo family done got KILLED by a seven headed vampire. Do y’all know anybody that can bring back a girl who was killed by a seven headed vampire back from the dead?

I do.

His name is Jesus!

God is Love!
BBN

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postheadericon I Ain’t A Terrorist

terrorists

Are these people terrorists?

If you think they are then y’all got another thing coming to you because they ain’t.  But Janet Napolitano thinks they are.  If it was up to her, they’d be locked up in some concentration camp undergoing “re-education” to turn them into the robo-Marxists that run the Obamanation or having some surgical procedure that would make them unable to pro-create in the way that God intended.

Know who else had a plan like that?  Hitler.

socialist
Wanna talk about an axis of evil?  If these three ever got together
the world would surely turn into a cesspool of sin, sodomy and
socialism before you could beg the Lord for forgiveness.

I wanna refresh your memory on who these folks really are and why they ain’t terrorists:

George Washington:

dollar

This is called a “dollar bill”.  It’s American money you buy things with under our CAPITALIST system.  It ain’ t just meaningless paper.  It ain’t scrip you get from working for some government factory making itchy wool socks or transitor radio that break down right after you take them outta the box.  It ain’t a government voucher for moldy cheese and stale bread.  It’s worth somthing. It’s not only worth something, it means something.  It means freedom – freedom to buy anything the Lord doesn’t find sinful.  It means capitalism – the economic system created by the United States of America that is the envy of the world.  It means democracy – the only system of government that allows capitalism to thrive and gives you the freedom to make the money that allows you to buy anything the Lord doesn’t find sinful.

Guess whose picture is on it?  That’s right.  George Washington.  Why is his picture on the dollar bill?  BECAUSE HE AIN’T A TERRORIST.

Mother Theresa

mother-teresa

Mother Theresa was a Catholic and Catholics ain’t Christians but she didn’t wanna kill pre-borns and she got leprosy which is enough to make anyone understand that blowing yourself up don’t solve no one’s problems.  Sure, she always wore something on her head but it weren’t a towel and she never bowed toward Mecca and that means that SHE AIN’T A TERRORIST.

Ronald Reagan

ronald_reagan

Even at the end of his life when he couldn’t go to the bathroom by himself and could only eat pudding, Ronald Reagan slept with a six gun under his pillow just in case the  Commies tried to sneak up on him.  He was that kinda man.  A man who never met a pre-born that he didn’t like.  A man who could sniff out socialism like a splunker lookng for water and twice as accurate.  A man who, even in his last waning years, could tame a wild horse that even the most hardened of cowpunchers feared.  In short – A MAN WHO WAS NOT A TERRORIST.

The Pope

pope-benedict-saturno-hat

Ok.  I’m gonna fess up and say I ain’t real sure that the Pope isn’t a terrorist.  He’d prolly take a bullet for a pre-born but he wants to see Israel destroyed.  He knows that homos is evil but he wants to destroy capitalism because some polar bear might have to swim a couple of extra feet to find an ice flow to eat the seal he killed.  He says he don’t like Commies but the Vatican’s got the largest collection of pornography in the world.  My daddy always told me that if a man wears a hat you should give him the benefit of the doubt.  So I’m gonna do that.  But I got my eye on you, Mr. Pope.

You

you

Do you love America?  Do you think that all life is sacred?  Are you willing to risk your life to make the world safe for Democracy, the American language and Jesus?  Do you like having a big plate of pork sausages for breakfast in the morning without some muslim calling you an infidel?  Are you one of the tens of  millions of Americans quietly stockpiling all the guns, ammo and kevlar vests your budget will allow as the Second Amendment mandates we do?  Did you not shed a tear as God righteously gave Tiller the Baby Killer his just desserts and sent him to Hell to incur the wrath of all women whose pre-borns he killed?  Do you think you oughta be able to drive an H2 without some hippie spray painting profanity all over it?  Are you tired of Barak Osama Homo bin Laden spending hundreds of billions of your tax dollars fixing potholes and protecting mosquitos when you could be using that money to buy one of them new flat screen HDTVs that’ll let you watch all the NASCAR races at the same time?  If you answered yes to any of these question then YOU AIN’T A TERRORIST.

But Janet Napolitano thinks you are.

Tell Janet Napolitano to go back to Russia – sign the petition to get her to resign TODAY!

God is Love!
BBN

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postheadericon The Good News!

It ain’t every Californian that’s a murderous, gay, nazi cannibal.  I ain’t saying that most of ’em ain’t, I’m just saying that they ain’t infected everybody yet and we still gotta chance to make sure that when Jesus come back He ain’t gotta be scared that when He gets to California that some homo don’t try to kill him and/or have intercourse with him.  That’s why I used to call Prop 8 the Protect Jesus Prop.  It’s the homo marriage thing, too, but homo marriage leads to homo children and  we know that you get to the second or third generation or homo that they get more and more strong like vampires do.

I’m putting this up as proof that us Christian ain’t nothing to do with hate and that we love homos enough to tell ’em that they’re gonna burn in Hell if they don’t stop hating American, whining like sissies and plotting to kill every policeman and government official in the United States of America.

I’m just glad these fine Christians had the GUTS to stand up for what’s right, unlike that fruitcake Rick Warren who sold out Jesus just so he could have gay sex with Homobama.

God is Love!
BBN

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postheadericon Stop Monkey-itis! Help Me Get To Austin!

With lie-beral defeato-crats getting ready to “celebrate” (ie – have butt-sex because of) Charles Dumb-win’s birthday, no place in our grand and glorious country is safe.  Least of all, Austin, TX where they’re planning to hold some kinda all-night orgy featuring – you guessed it – Richard Zimmerman.  This Zimmerman guy is prolly more dangerous than watching all the episodes of Will And Grace back to back cuz he got that hypnotism thing on his lower lip and you can’t take yer eye off it and wind up think his songs are funny rather than a direct message from Satan.

So I need to get down there and, if not stop that show, then at least get in there and tell the crowd what GOD wants ’em to know – THAT WE DON’T COME FROM MONKEYS!  Not now.  Now then.  Not never!

So click on the PayPal thing over there on the right (haha!) and let the world know if your Anti-monkey  or Super Anti-monkey!  Do it now!  I gotta be in Austin by 2/15 or that part of Texas might as well be given back to the Mexicans!

God is Love!
BBN

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postheadericon Proof That Barack HUSSEIN Obama Ain’t A Christian!

Barack HUSSEIN Obama ain’t a Christian and the Christian Anti-Defamation Commission is gonna prove it to ya with a SEVEN part series.  That’s same as the number of days in Creation Week except it’s gonna be  Barack HUSSEIN Obama’s destruction instead because as soon as American’s have the PROOF that Homobama ain’t a Christian then you know they dang well will not vote for him or the corrupt Catholic he got as a “running mate”.

Now, y’all maybe thinking that you ain’t heard of the Christian Anti-Defamation Commission and maybe wondering if it’s got anything with them Jews.  It don’t.  It was founded by General William Hollis who’s “an unabashed American patriot who loves both God and country and has shown it by his life’s work.”  He don’t like nobody talking down Christians and I’m pretty sick of it, too.  I’ve said it before, but I can’t walk down the street without somebody spitting on me and calling me a Christian.  So, that’s why he founded it.  I’m hoping that he’s gonna be able to get some laws passed that make it illegal to discriminate against Christians.

Even though it was founded in 1999, there were some “extenuating circumstances” that kept Gen. Hollis from really gearing up to stop the slander against Christians.  But now that he’s been on the job for a year or so, things is gonna be looking up more than me watching the sky for the Rapture!

This is only the first of the seven parts, so y’all keep an eye out on their YouTube channel!

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postheadericon Sarah Palin’s Gotta Resign

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postheadericon Billy Bob vs. The Witches

This past Friday, the Lord set me a task that I didn’t really know if I was up to – converting witches in Buffalo, NY.  I shoulda known that the Lord would stand beside me and guide me through the night with a light from above!

God is Love!

And don’t forget to come to First Parish, 35 Church St. in Watertown, MA when I make mincemeat out of Richard Zimmerman

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